Anyone who knows me knows of my distain for cell phones. As a society, we used to be happy, live just fine, feel fulfilled even back before cell phones became extensions of our bodies. Really. I know it's hard to believe but it's true. And guess what else? More of us could just sit back then. Just sit and listen to ourselves, to our surroundings, acknowledge our kids (heck our spouses, friends, what have you) when they wanted to show us something. We enjoyed being alone even. We enjoyed reading, actual printed material. We used to be able to go to dinner with another person and actually talk to them, enjoy their company. I loathe seeing people eat a meal "together" while on their personal cell phones. Makes my heart hurt. People don't seem able to sit on a train, rock, bench, seashore, park, name it, without checking to see what inane thing the internet is spewing out at that moment. People used to be on their phones all the time. What I mean by that is they used to talk to people on their phones all the time. The first time I saw someone with a blue tooth I thought they were crazy, talking to themselves. Then I noticed a little metallic and plastic device on their ear. Now, when I see people, they are still on their phones but they aren't talking anymore, they are touching screens or texting. I like the ease having a phone would bring but I hope never to have one. I want to really see what is around me. I want to see my baby. My husband. My friends and neighbors. And this is where we come to my admission: Hi. My name is Kara and I am a helicopter parent.
There. It's out. I'll admit one thing further. I ADORE my almost 3 year old. I LOVE looking directly into her beautiful intelligent eyes and listening to what she has to say. She is hilarious. She is aware. She draws her own thoughts and conclusions and will share them with me. We can TALK. Can you believe that? She listens to me and I listen to her. We never have to stop what we are doing because a call or text came in that was "more important" than her. I love going places with her. We talk about what we are doing, all the time as we travel through our lives. We try on makeup together at the mall. We spend time going for walks, talking to the neighbors. When she shows me things, I look at them. I see so many parents completely ignore things their children are excited about because they are glass eye glued to a ridiculous screen.. Sarah and I enjoy reading together. We enjoy working together. She is a smart, kind and helpful child. We play with friends together. We love playing with other moms and their kids. My daughter loves playing with other kids. She is brave and will just walk up to other kids and say hi. And we do it all without the annoyance of a cell phone.
Don't misunderstand me. We have our bad days. Nothing in life is perfect. I have plenty stories here to attest to just that. But you know what? My daughter knows that I am her mom. I will be there for her. I will fight for her. I will help her. I respect her. I LOVE playing with her at the park, the mall, the library, the farm or any of the other place we go. We are friends and I AM her MOM. All in one. I get hate seeing kids run up to their parents at the park, library, what have you, and be shushed and waved away because there is something far more important on the phone to look at. Life with small children is short. Put down the damn phone and look at your kid. Play with them. Talk to them.
This doesn't mean that you can't have mom friends. I ADORE my mom friends. They are a lifeline to me. This doesn't mean your child can't have and play with their own friends. But if giving a damn about my child, looking at her, playing with her, talking to her, being PRESENT with her makes me a helicopter parent, BRING IT ON. If you wanna hang back and be cool while your kid does their own thing, fine; but, don't give us more "hands on" parents crap for parenting just a little differently than you. (Perhaps you're just feeling a little guilty? Just a bit?) Nah.
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